The Aesthete faces his critics

The Aesthete was reminded last week that he cannot spell for nuts. He also used his two pretentious words of the week in a rather inelegant manner so calumny and obloquy were deservedly heaped on him. I blame the dangerously volatile paint thinners that are part of the transformation of the Alfetta GTV. Lurid hallucinations and wild mood swings are just the start of it. Still, some pleasure was gained through a visit from Alfa club friends bearing old photos of the GTV in its pomp. The moustaches suggested a date in the early 1990s which is when I first saw the car parked outside the old Dunedin Police Station looking sharp indeed.  

1950 Morris Minor Convertible. This streamlined low light Minor has a look to it that is suggestive of a speedster resto-mod project. I suggest a twin cam motor and five speed gearbox with painted wire wheels and a lowered front screen. Gunmetal grey and red interior would be ideal and a cowling over the rear seats would be cute too.

For: Go on. Show some spirit there.
Against: Oh come on. It would be fun.
Investment potential: 4/10 if you were clever about the right parts.

1951 Reliant 8cwt. Yikes! You would not wish to drive one of these unloaded as the chassis dynamics were set up with a few hundredweight of sausage casings in mind. Most were bodied as vans and I cannot help but think it would make the most wonderful flower wagon. An Austin Seven type motor got them going at a decent clip but you would need to be brave. Is there a brake on that front wheel?

For: Yes, it is real.
Against: Sadly...
Investment potential: 3/10. I see a rosy future for it at the farmers' market.

1939 Mercury Eight. Staying with the distressed theme for a moment longer, this 1939 Mercury radiates integrity from its worn through paintwork to its sideways Morris Minor tail lights. This was the sort of thing that made a very acceptable first car for a young fellow back in the day so most ended upside down in a ditch. My own dear mother managed this particular manoeuvre while overtaking a truck on a gravel road.

For: You can put the new headlining in it but then leave it alone.
Against: Accept it for what it is.
Investment potential: 2/10 as long as you don't spend any more money on it.

1973 Jensen Healey. A misbegotten effort to update the tiring MGB formula for the American market, the Jensen Healey suffered from clumsy styling that was muddled further by William Towns, plus a woefully under developed Lotus engine. Properly sorted out as this one appears to be, they are quick and surprisingly pleasant to drive. Permanently depressed values make them seem like a bargain as long as you can forget their reputation.

For: Best that you run hard in the opposite direction from a Jensen Healey but this one is worth a look.
Against: All that is stated above and more.
Investment potential: 1/10. In this age of dirt cheap MX5s, who can be bothered?

1958 Jaguar 3.4 Saloon. This Jaguar comes with a three speed automatic which allowed a split bench front seat with the gear selection operated by a lever under the centre of the dash. These peculiarities add great charm to the already appealing Jaguar traits and the great urge of the 3.4 engine still allowed for 120 mph performance. Needless to say, that was a cracking pace in 1958 and no disgrace now.

For: No more nasty whines and crashing first gears now.
Against: Not much that stands out from here.
Investment potential: 3/10 and great for towing a period caravan.

Well, halloo old friend.

1955 Nash Farina. Engineless, rusted out and with a ruined interior, this Nash requires a fanatic like the charming fellow I met at the Dunedin Autospectacular last year with just such a car. The time involved in the restoration of these fascinating vehicles does not lead to great prices but this does not perturb the vendor who sticks doggedly to the 4.5K price.

For: Italo-US hybrid styling of real elegance.
Against: Oh come on. Give it to someone.
Investment potential: Well, not great it must be said.

On some faraway beach

1960 Borgward Isabella Coupe. Borgwards were, to be charitable, no great beauties. This deficit was elegantly remedied with the coupe version of the excellent Isabella that shared no panels with the homely two door saloon. This example comes with the accessory rev counter which adds thousands to the anticipated price, or so says the starry eyed vendor.

For: This would almost sway me from the Italians.
Against. Rusty sills might be the start of it.
Investment potential: Should be worth more than a Karmann Ghia but probably won't be.