The Aesthete visits Auckland and finds it broken.

The Aesthete's Fleet

Sorry, there is no other word for it. One dented rear bumper on the harbour bridge paralysed much of the city for an hour and a half on a SATURDAY. I can now fully understand why I have not seen any interesting old cars on the road as you would be mad to go out in anything but a five year old Nissan Tiida. I did see one amusing spectacle, however.  Four gangsters in a Mercedes 300 proceeding north on the motorway pointing their fingers out the windows as if to shoot other motorists and giving gang salutes to exhausted commuters. I wondered if they were heading for their fortified gang pad in Arkles Bay? Hilarious.

 As I am still busy sorting my elderly parents' affairs out I will let other readers do the picking this week but here is one from the Aesthete to get started with. I will begin the bikes next week.

1953 Alvis TA21. What is going on in the Alvis market? There are either more of these fine vehicles in New Zealand than I had thought or all the Alvis owners alive have clubbed together to sell their cars at once. This is the desirable Tickford-bodied drop head coupe version of the more familiar four door saloon. It is properly coach built in alloy so the condition of the timber frame is paramount. That said, it is sportier than a Daimler or Armstrong Siddeley and cheap for what it is.

For: Elegant, quite quick and with an all synchro gearbox, nice to drive.
Against: Look for evidence of rough repairs. This is well beyond an amateur's scope.
Investment potential: 3/10 if you think of the alternatives.

1952 Sunbeam Talbot 90 MkII. The cunning Rootes brothers made creative use of the Humber parts bin to concoct a smart little saloon for the post-war market. A large number were exported to the colonies and they made a more modern alternative to a Riley RM. The long bonnet covered a stonking great four cylinder motor that normally hauled around a Humber Hawk and the narrow cabin and bucket seats encouraged a measure of sporting behaviour.

For: Oh, those rear spats, definitely. Grwwlll.
Against: They rallied these in snow and ice... How?
Investment potential: 2/10. Perennially undervalued, there are two of these for sale in excellent condition for 10K.

2008 Smart ForFour Brabus: Is this the future of our hobby? Probably, so best get used to it now. I have to say, these clever little devices stand out in traffic and I have had a many chances to study traffic close up over the past ten days. Almost all modern cars seem to be cloned from the nearest equivalent Mercedes so you may as well have a Smart, a midget Merc in all but name. It weighs the same as a crisp packet and packs 174 hp so it will make you shout out loud.

For: More fun than a Lotus Elise!
Against: People will think you are a latte sipping boofhead. Or worse,  Mike Hosking.
Investment potential: 0/10. Nowhere but down until the boofheads move out of the market.

1983 Zimmer Golden Spirit. I am sure you would have to be a European philosopher with an unpronounceable name spelt with Zs, Ys and Ks to plumb the depths of alternative reality that produced this but, as the vendor says, everyone will know you have arrived. I suggested this as a Wellington town car to the other Aesthete, now domiciled there and curating shows at Te Papa. They would drop to their knees in The Terrace if you drove by in this.

For: I am not sure but I imagine the Germans have a word for it.
Against: You would have to stop laughing at some point.
Investment potential: What is doodly-squat expressed as a percentage?

1987 Citroen CX GTi. Until the benighted 1990s when they all were, no Citroen was ever boring and so it is difficult to see why the CX GTi was never really replaced in the range. Now that a plastic toy shaken from a cereal box can exceed 220KPH, the idea of a four door grand routier that can travel all day at that speed seems quaint but if I was driving from Dunedin to Christchurch regularly, this is what I would take for the ride.

For: Comfortable, fast and still cheap, even at this price.,
Against: You will need Wonderboy sooner or later. I have his number.
Investment potential: 3/10. Really good ones will follow DSes upwards.

On some faraway beach...

1974 Citroen GS Birotor. It almost seems like the rotary engine never existed now that Mazda has finally ceased developing it. In the 1970s though, everyone was having a go. You could even by a Holden Kingswood fitted with one, although it was badged as a Mazda and only sold to the certifiably insane.  The link is gone from Ebay France but you can see what you missed here on Bring A Trailer...

For: No-one else will have one, here, there or anywhere else.
Against: Oh, many things I am sure.
Investment potential: A noisy, smokey, fuel guzzling and impossible to maintain Citroen anyone? Anyone at all?