Five for the seriously disturbed

Cars, cocktails, girls' names and tunes

The Modfather gets half of the old firm from the Jam together for one last caper. And is that Mike Garson going free style on the old joanna? (Listen to Alladin Sane if this is all too vague)

1957 Humber 80. Humber 80s only existed in New Zealand. It was a piece of badge engineering by Todd Motors to cash in on the superior connotations of Humber whose limousines were used by the NZ Government to ferry important personages about. Cheapskates. This one is in a ravishing colour combination and they make demon classic race cars if that is your bent.  For: The early ones like this are the best looking. Against: A bit ponderous in standard tune.

1961 Chrysler New Yorker Coupe. The 'letter series' Chryslers that send collectors into fits are essentially that year's New Yorker Coupe with added performance options. Here you get the looks and luxury with a slightly softer V8 and a floaty ride. Dare I say you may not see 200K difference if you drove them both? For: Those off centre stacked headlights. Against: Still a bit on the pricey side, looking at US values.

1966 Austin 1800 Camper.  It was a toss-up this week between a 210K silver Ferrari 330 GT and an  Austin 1800 Camper so you must know by now I am in a strange mood. It is almost impossible to imagine how an 1800 could be uglier than its designers intended but voila! And a nice bespoke interior in teak ply to kip in while the rest of the camping ground sniggers from their Winnebagos. I know where I would rather be. For: Preposterous. Against: Plenty, I am sure.

1969 Honda S800. What a heap of #@*! I hear you say. Has the Aesthete lost his mind? Perhaps. as 13K is a lot of money to pay for a decaying Honda but look at what you are getting. An 800cc dry- sumped alloy motor that would spin to 10,000 RPM for a start and that is a sensation that is almost impossible to match outside a single seater. Is this the classic for our times? For: Go on, be brave. Against: Could break your heart.

1970 MG 1300. No-one can say the Petrolhead Aesthete lacks for variety this week. I featured a four door MG 1100 a few months back which still languishes unsold so maybe a 1300 two door will do the trick. Arguably the best of all the ADO 16 variants as well as being a rare and lovely thing. For: A honey. Against: Very little that I can see.